How pakistani Professors speak english:

1)don‘t dare talk in front of my back!

2)both of you three get out of the class!

3)Take 5 cm wire of any length!

4)All of u stand in a straight circle!

5)Be quiet..The Principal just passed away

6)Y r u looking at the monkey outside the window when i am here

Child:Mom is baar sab Patakhay hum is shop se lain gay,

Mom:Beta ye to girls hostel hai,

Child:Apa to kehti hain k sari phuljhariyan yahin rehti hain

Santa:yaar tu kise de ghar afsos manane k liye gaya tha itni jaldi aa gaya

Banta:yaar 1 ghanta baitha raha kise ne haas k gall tak nahi kiti

Lardka: tumari ankhen ktni haseen hai,

Lardki: Choro na,

Lardka: Tumhare baal ktne khobsurat hai,

Lardki: Choro na, App B.

Lardka: Itne der se chor hi to raha tha

Agar WINDOWS Punjabi Main Hoti Tou . . .

SEND = SUTTO

INSERT = PAO

DOWNLOAD = THALLE LAO

DELETE = MITTI PAO

RUN = NASO

SEARCH = LABO

ALT CTRL DEL = SYAPA HII MUKAO

Guest: “Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?“

Hotel Host: “I can‘t imagine, unless it‘s because you have the plate he usually eats from.“

Showing his friend around his home, Jennings pointed out all of the collectibles he and his wife had acquired over their long years of marriage.

“The day before I die, I‘d like to sell every piece we‘ve got just to see how much it‘s all worth.“

“Well,“ his friend replies, “since you couldn‘t possibly know the day before you were going to die, you‘ll never be able to sell!“

“And that‘s where you‘re wrong,“ the man smiled. “If I sell it, my wife would kill me!“

An english man and a desi man were both going to a interview. They were asked to use the colours green. pink and yellow. The english man goes in and says the grass is green, the sun is yellow and the sunset is pink. The desi man goes in and says my phone goes green green i pink it up and i say yellow!!

Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?

Pupil: Moon…

Teacher : Why?

Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don‘t need it.

There were two Christians Travelling on a plane. Sitting behind them was a Muslims. As they realized that a Muslims is Travelling with them. They started talking loudly with each other.

James said to Tim.

Tim where r u going, hopefully to Dubai.

Tim said Nah

There are too many Muslims, streets and roods are flooded with them.

James smiles and said then u must be going to Iran.

Tim said r u mad, Muslims in Iran are more fanatic and mad then Dubai.

Muslim who was listening to them could not bear it and said hey u both go to hell, for sure there would be no Muslim.